According to Lynn Lyons, these are the six skills we should teach:
- Adult connection with each and every student is ESSENTIAL and will make a BIG difference
- Think about the students that made the most progress and the connections they had now think about he students that made the least progress adn the connections they had. Connections matter!
- Able to tolerate uncertainty
- Grit or persistence is the ability to move through uncertainty
- Able to handle unexpected things
- The opposite of being rigid
- Student are often rigid so that they can avoid a challenge
- In order to be flexible we need to manage our emotions first
- In order to problem solve we need to be flexible first
- Teachers cn reinforce all different instances of being flexible
3. Emotional Management
- Teachers can NORMALIZE all emotions
- We all have feelings, thoughts, and sensations and sometimes they make sense, sometimes they don't
- You are allowed to have your feelings, what matters is what you do NEXT
- Adult (and students) need to learn to tolerate distress
- Calming down is not the primary goal!
- When adults say "you need tdo calm down', students hear you are not supposed to have strong feelings.
- We can teach breathing and relaxation, but they should not be our primary focus
- We want students to find ways to appropriately manage their emotions
- Coping Skills : talking back to worry, know how and when to take a break, mindfulness, ect.
- Distraction is NOT a great long term too!
4. Elimination is NOT the goal !
- Feelings are going to show up ! they are NORMAL!
- Teacher's can have the understanding that the goal is for students to expect feelings and then learn to manage them!
- The goal of emotional management is to cope with emotions not get rid of them.
5. Problem Solving
- Teachers can teach, promote, and reinforce the problem solving mode.
- Identify the problem
- Brainstorm solutions
- Select a solution
- Implement the solution
- Reflect on the effectiveness of the solution
- Even an unwanted feeling can be viewed as a problem to be solved!
6. Temporary vs. Permanent
- Fixed vs Growth Mindset
- This is who I am vs. This is PART of who I am
- I will always be this way vs. I can work on changing the PART of me that is causing me to have a problem
- Teaches ca remind students that walking talking , riding a bike, math facts, reading, etc. are all skills that they did not kow how to do before but with practice CAN learn.